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Opining of a Cranky Old Man
Lots a ‘Jerks’ in the News Drawing the Ire of the
Grouchy Old Man from Michigan
Palin is obviously ready to assume the role of
“national joke” and I say that from a lifetime of voting Republican!
By Bill Kalmar, Retiree
 July
16, 2009 - One of the advantages of retirement is just to lie down in my
hammock, listen to the chirping of the birds or a colorful woodpecker
tap away on a tree, watch squirrels scamper around the woods foraging
for food, and reflect on some events of the day. Here is what has been
bubbling up in my cranium lately:
● Once again the American League has beaten the
National League in the All Star Game. And one of our own Detroit Tigers,
Curtis Granderson, was instrumental in the win as he blasted a triple
into left field and then scored on a sacrifice fly which gave the
American League a one run lead which held till the end of the game.
The
American League now has home field advantage for the World Series which
I think is wrong. Home field should be predicated on the best won/loss
record just as in the other sports! And I think most fans agree.
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More by Bill Kilmar |
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That was the week that was! I'm not even cranky
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May 1, 2009
Believe It or Not, the Cranky Old Man Has Some Things
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He is mad, really mad and wants you to know the
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Opinions & Analysis for Seniors |
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● Are you as tired as me about hearing that we
need to ratchet up our education process in order to be ready for the
demands of the 21st century! If we aren’t ready now, we will never be
ready! Frankly, no one has explained the so-called “demands” other than
we need to compete with China.
Here in Michigan with unemployment at 15%, getting
ready for the 21st century evidently means we will be making windmills
and solar panels. Heck, the Dutch in Holland, Michigan have been
deploying windmills on their property for years and the Amish seem to do
well without electricity. So in my mind we are already ready for the
21st century.
Now if we can just convince the youth of our nation
to stay in school and graduate maybe they can learn how to build solar
power for us!
● Looks like this is the final year for the
Michigan State Fair which has been around since 1849. This event really
needs to be transferred to the Lansing area so that the entire
population of the state can have easy access.
As it is now the buildings at the fair are long
past their life expectancy and it’s time to put this relic to rest. And
it’s also time to modernize the exhibits! I really am not interested in
the pigeon and rabbit exhibits or the butter sculptures!
But please don’t forget to transfer the elephant
ear stand to Lansing!
● Have you read where Michael Jackson’s father now
wants to take Jackson’s three children on tour and label it as the
Jackson Three! Talk about the height of impropriety but this guy has no
shame! Wonder if he will have them don their masks and parade them
around for Halloween. Don’t put it past this jerk!
● And speaking of jerks how about the Governor of
South Carolina? Governor Sanford informs us that his love muffin in
Argentina is his soul mate but he is “trying to fall back in love with
his wife”. Give me a break! Sanford should be thrown out of the
Governor’s mansion and also thrown out of his home. And if his wife
reconciles with this prime example of moral turpitude, then she should
join the circle of jerks too!
● Seems Bernard Madoff has been whisked off to
jail for 150 years. In fact, if you look at the Federal Prison’s list of
inmates you will discover that his release date is 11/14/2139 – just in
time for Thanksgiving! Pass the mashed potatoes! Wonder if Madoff will
place X’s on the wall of his cell? That’s a lot of X’s!
● Hopefully Green Bay Packer, New York Jets,
Minnesota Vikings quarterback Brett Favre will retire some day and be
inducted into the Football Hall of Fame! In the meantime I have grown
weary of his antics and just wish he would stay in Wisconsin with the
rest of the cheese heads!
● If you get an opportunity travel to Muskegon and
experience Michigan Adventure Park. It is closer and cheaper than any
other amusement park. In addition, there are loads of rides including
the monster roller coaster Shivering Timbers. And the water park is
first class.
● Has anyone figured out what Alaska Governor
Sarah Palin is up to? Maybe she is auditioning for Vice President
because our country has a history of laughable VP’s – Dan Quayle and Joe
Biden come to mind. Palin is obviously ready to assume the role of
“national joke” and I say that from a lifetime of voting Republican!
● Well, that’s it for now. I’m still daydreaming
in my hammock but a swarm of mosquitoes have located me – the woodpecker
is becoming annoying – and the squirrels have discovered my container of
cashews so it’s time to call it a day. In addition, a thunderstorm just
surfaced giving us another power outrage.
Maybe windmills aren’t such a bad idea after all!
L Bill Kalmar is retired in Lake Orion, Michigan,
and is the former Director of the Michigan Quality Council. He is a
frequent contributor to SeniorJournal.com. His opinions are his own.
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